Update

So, I am not doing the figure competition. It was a very difficult decision and it has been 2 weeks since I made up my mind. Well, actually my body decided.

To give a quick summary:
I have lost 35-40 pds in the last 3 years. This resulted in me overtraining, doing lots of cardio, and limiting calories. I had been eating minimal calories for quite awhile and my weight would not budge. So I started training for the competition. I was able to drop 5 pounds and then hit a sticking point. No matter how much cardio or what meal plan I was on, it wasnt working. I tried a keto meal plan and couldnt lose weight. I was doing fasted cardio and pm cardio and my weight would not budge. So after training for months, it seemed that something else was wrong. I had this feeling that something was wrong and my trainer instructed me to see a physician.

I had my blood work done.... The verdict is....1) May have a thyroid problem 2) My hormone levels are drastically low. 3) I am going to see an endocrinologist.

So this leaves me in a frustrated spot. I want to lose 10 more pounds. I keep training and am eating healthy, but my weight just remains at the same point. This is a challenge for me and I am terrified of gaining weight. I know that I need to gain a healthy balance, but it is very difficult. I have been measuring and weighing food for years.

So we shall see where this takes me. I know I need a healthier relationship with life and food. I need to relax and enjoy life.